The 9 dumbest mistakes from a Grinchy Sunday in the NFL, ranked

The Lions still don’t know how to defend a Hail Mary, and the Steelers put their playoff fate in the hands of the Browns. What a wonderful, awful idea!

For a few NFL teams, this week was as full of yuletide cheer as Whoville. The Cowboys and Patriots, such lovable underdogs, clinched division titles. The Seahawks and Texans officially made the the playoffs. The Saints are going to make every team in the NFC have to come to the Superdome.

But for others, the weekend before Christmas was as cuddly as a cactus, as charming as an eel, a three-decker sauerkraut and toadstool sandwich with arsenic sauce.

Whether the cost was playoff positioning or simply pride, these are the nine most Grinch-like moments of Week 16:

9. Rob Gronkowski’s bad year continued

The good news for New England on Sunday was that Sony Michel and a dominant blocking game established the team’s running game in advance of the postseason. The even better news was that the Patriots won their 10th straight AFC East title.

The bad news was Tom Brady and Rob Gronkowski, once the most fearsome pitch-and-catch duo in the AFC, once again failed to rekindle their past magic.

Not only did Gronkowski finish the game with zero catches on three targets, but he was also the catalyst behind Brady’s second interception of the game:

That drop gave Buffalo the short field that ended the Patriots’ shutout hopes. To make matters worse, Gronkowski also got dinged for his fourth penalty since Week 13 — a holding call that wiped out a 5-yard run — to further the narrative he just hasn’t been himself in his ninth year as a pro.

8. The Bills thought Julian Edelman was down

Everyone who made “the Patriots are done” predictions last week are the equivalent of the Bills defense on this play:

Not only did the Bills give up a long completion on fourth down, they gave up a touchdown when a simple follow-through tackle could’ve prevented it.

That gave the Patriots a 21-6 lead in a game they won 24-12.

7. Run, Nick Mullens, run

With just over a minute remaining and the 49ers trailing the Bears 14-9, Nick Mullens could’ve run for a first down on fourth-and-4. Instead, he heaved the ball down the field ... and out of bounds:

At least he he didn’t hurt the 49ers’ draft position this week.

6. The Giants choked away a win

The Giants didn’t trail for the first 59 minutes of the game; despite that, they just couldn’t put the Colts away for various Giants-like reasons.

In the third quarter, a Janoris Jenkins hold, a pretty blatant one at that, wiped out a sack/fumble that would have given the Giants the ball back. The Colts hung onto it and scored two plays later to cut the Giants’ lead to 24-21.

Leading by the same score with just over 10 minutes left to play, the Giants had the chance to make it a two-score game. Then, Saquon Barkley got stuffed on second-and-2 at the Colts’ 7-yard line, and Eli Manning couldn’t connect on third-and-4 to keep the drive alive.

That set up a key fourth-down decision. The Giants are 59 percent on fourth-down conversions this season, better than the league average. The Colts defense is 50 percent at stopping fourth downs, below the NFL average. So naturally, they decided to kick it, giving them a 27-21 lead and keeping it a one-score game.

The Colts scored on the next drive to take the lead, but the Giants got the ball back with 55 seconds left. Plenty of time to kick a game-winning field goal ... but, ahhahahaha, no way, not these Giants.

Barkley failed to get out of bounds on first down after that, chewing up precious seconds they needed for a comeback. Two plays later, Eli overthrew it and the Colts picked him off to seal the game.

5. Chris Conley, you can’t carry the ball like that

Look at Chris Conley, thinking he’s Shady McCoy here:

Yeah, that turned into a fumble about a half-second later.

Conley had just picked up a 23-yard gain, with 23 seconds left before halftime. So rather than the Chiefs getting a chance to cut into Seattle’s lead or take the lead themselves, the Seahawks went into the half up 14-10. They never trailed in the second half.

Andy Reid should make Conley walk around the Chiefs’ practice facilities with a football in his hands at all times, like he’s Darnell Jefferson in The Program.

4. Josh Allen should stick to running

Exhibit A: This Josh Allen throw.

Exhibit B: And this one.

Exhibit C: And one more.

Allen’s terrible throwing isn’t really news. He finished the game 20-for-41 with two picks and a touchdown pass. Good thing he can run ... except he didn’t contribute much with his legs this week, just 30 yards. That was still almost a team high.

3. The Lions still don’t know how to defend a Hail Mary

Detroit had six defenders in the end zone to prevent the Vikings’ Hail Mary attempt at the end of the first half. They knew it was coming, yet, they were still unprepared for it. Kyle Rudolph was basically free to make the catch on his own. The defensive back behind him and nobody around to actually challenge him for the catch, or even to knock the ball away from him.

This capped off a really terrible sequence for the Lions. Minnesota had just scored to cut its deficit to 9-7, but the Lions got the ball back with 1:25 left in the half to pad their lead. They managed to move it just 14 yards (5 of which came from a Vikings penalty). On third-and-4, they only got 3 yards on a checkdown pass to kill the drive and give the Vikings the ball back with 36 seconds left. And then that happened.

If this play looked familiar, it should. Aaron Rodgersdid the same thing to the Lions in 2015.

2. The Jaguars are bad at tanking too

Sure, they won, but they got Blake Bortles back at starting quarterback. Oh, also these things happened.

And ...

And the grand finale ...

:chef kiss:

1. The Steelers’ ill-advised fake punt might have dashed their playoff hopes

The Steelers were doing something not many opposing teams do in the Superdome: They were looking comfortable and in control late in the game against New Orleans. Pittsburgh had scored 14 straight points to take a 28-24 lead. The Saints hadn’t sniffed the end zone since early in the third quarter and had their field goal attempt blocked on their previous possession.

With 4:11 left and the ball at their own 42-yard line, the Steelers were lined up to punt on fourth-and-4. That’s when, for some reason, they decided to try to fake it ... and came up just short (sorry, Roosevelt Nix):

Mike Tomlin said he wanted to be aggressive, but that call handed the Saints the ball on the Pittsburgh 46-yard line. Of course they scored soon after (with a little help from a pass interference penalty).

But the Steelers still had a chance to tie or take the lead. Antonio Brown’s heroic effort on fourth-and-15 kept them alive and with 41 seconds left, Ben Roethlisberger found JuJu Smith-Schuster for another game — until he fumbled it:

And just like that, the Steelers’ AFC North lead vanished and they dropped from the No. 4 seed to the No. 8 seed. Now they need to beat the Bengals next week AND for the Ravens to lose to the Browns.

Putting your playoff hopes in the hands of the Browns? Bold move, Steelers. Especially how it happened. Because the three words that best describe that fake punt and I quote: “Stink, stank, stunk!”